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IVF journey

I have shared my IVF journey here before but I think it is time to touch on it again.

My son is almost 13 still to this day it can bring tears to my eyes to talk about this.

It was a journey that affected me deeply and stays woven deeply into the fabric of my life experience.


It was a four year journey for us from uttering those words "let's try for a baby" and innocently thinking we would be pregnant soon, to delivering our baby boy.

I didn't realise that my intense and painful periods (which required me taking days off) could point to a fertility problem. I actually remember saying to a friend "I have always had very regular and painful periods so I must be good and fertile."

Oh how wrong I was, and I cannot believe I put up with that pain for so many years without seeking help.


When we found ourselves sitting in the office of a fertility clinic, the first thing the doctor very quickly figured out was that it was highly likely I had endometriosis. Surgery followed and when I didn't become pregnant naturally following that procdure, we were back in that same office following further tests discovering that Stu also had fertility issues, and hearing the words -

"the combination of your fertility issues creates an exponential problem"

Turns out this was never going to be easy.


Fast forward a couple of years after 2 unsuccessful rounds of IUI, 2 of IVF and an early miscarriage. We were staring down the barrel of our third cycle of IVF, starting from scratch again. Our specialist told us at this point that if it didn't work out we would need to start looking at alternatives like egg donation.


Our hearts were heavy, we were exhausted, and the pain of the failed cycles was still very much with us. We feared we would never become parents. I avoided anything to do with babies which affected our friendships and social life. There were a lot of tears. I started to believe I didn't deserve to become a mother - that this was some kind of punishment. We had to find something within us to go again, one more time.


And we did.

We'd never been very good at IVF. Eggs and embryos proved hard to come by.

This cycle produced two good embryos, something we had never had before. Two!

It is not standard procedure in New Zealand to put more than one embryo back into the uterus at one time, but we were given special dispensation due to the low levels of success we were having. Oh how I wished for twins. So much!


Twins did not come, but a miracle did happen.

One of those little embryos held on, fought and grew and we finally had a baby on the way.

I loved being pregnant so much. I longed so much for the big belly and the excitement around it.


On the 4th of July 2008 our baby boy entered this world and we breathed a huge sigh of relief that he was finally here. Our baby was in our arms and it felt magic.

We were finally granted the gift of parenthood. We had fought for this and it was finally here.


Thank you Elijah for choosing us to be your parents. We are so grateful xx







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